Week 2 Blogging Challenge response

It's that time again! Here is my response to the Week 2 blogging challenge... Gotta say, this was a hard one! Normally I am so focused on my negatives, I never give myself a break for the positives so this time I have tried to be nice to myself.  Thanks for this challenge, ladies... it was an eye opener!

This is the Challenge:

Tell me about your STRENGTHS
I WANT to know about your physical strengths.
I WANT to know about your mental strengths.
I WANT to know about the habits you have that make you strong.
I WANT to know what it is about you that makes you the fighter that is inside.


My physical strengths are pretty easy I suppose - I have a functioning, able and relatively healthy and injury free body. Despite the large skin graft on my left foot from a tumour removal that can sometimes cause pain and discomfort, my body has healed phenomenally so well that most times I don't even know it's there. My co-ordination is pretty good, and with every single group fitness class or exercise, I am getting stronger every day. I really have nothing holding me back physically, which does make me extraordinarily fortunate compared to many other ladies. I couldn't imagine having to wage this battle with the flab AND have physical issues to deal with as well.

My mental strengths are slowly growing in number but my number 1 strength will be my sheer stubbornness. All my life I was told that I was a stubborn kid and I would never do something unless *I* wanted to do it. And I am going to use this stubbornness and single mindedness to make this 12 week program a raging success. I'm turning something that I was always told was a negative, and making it work FOR me. I am so pretty self-motivated. I quit my job last year and went out on my own as a freelancer, worked my ass off (I wish that was literal, lol) and created myself a nice little business and a good reputation. I am what my husband calls a "front loader" - which means that in the workplace, I do all my tasks assigned before I relax, before I stop or go home. And that's pretty much true, I put in alot of effort into my business and made it my focus, my priority but now it's time to extend that drive into other areas of my life. I am applying the same qualities that helped my business to my weight loss - organization, self-motivation, focus and just bloody doing what needs to be done even if I am not in the mood!

I am constantly working on my habits, but mostly it's being ORGANISED. I spent days over the Xmas break cleaning out, and rearranging my cupboards at home - everything has its place and now, all it takes is a few minutes every day to ensure I keep the house tidy. I am in this house alot- I work from home, and without a tidy house, I can not concentrate... So keeping my surroundings organised means I have more time for the things that matter: my family, my friends, my kitties, my business, my weight loss, sculpting my body into what I want it to be. They say it takes 21 days to form a habit, and right now I am working on making exercise a habit by doing something every single day. I'm currently on Day 8 - so far, so good :)

What makes me a fighter inside is my determination to live the life I want to live. I turned 30 last year and I love being in my 30's, I am so much more confident in myself as a person, in my beliefs and in my attitudes than what I ever was in my 20s. The only thing lacking is a strong body. Fortunately, this is something I can change. I LOVE the journey, I love savoring every single tiny achievement - whether its getting up and going to the gym or surviving a boot camp, or something tiny like having another glass of water instead of tea. I BELIEVE that this will happen for me this time, and that confidence has filled me with an inner calmness... I can just enjoy this journey to the new me because I have no doubt I will eventually get there if I follow this program properly and put in the effort. No one else can do this for me, so its time for me to do this for myself, for my own reasons, for my own sense of achievements.

Week 1 Review

Wow, I didnt think it would take me so long to get back to this blog to make another post!  So much has happened this week, it's a bit of a blur... I can't believe we are practically one week down of this Round already! It will be over before we know it.

I took Michelle's motto "JFDI" to heart this week and on Monday, I went and signed up on a monthly membership to a gym that runs a lot of Les Mills classes - I used to do these classes when I had a fernwood membership many moons ago and LOVED them.  So glad that I did, even though it hurts the hip pocket because I have been to a class every day since I have signed up - well, okay, not including today but I did a boot camp today (which I will get to later).  Normally I would agonise about this decision and spending the cash for weeks, then procrastinate some more, then before I know it, weeks and months will go by and I havent done anything!  But not this time.  I walked in and joined up pretty much on the spot (it helped they waived the joining fee and threw in an extra 2 weeks free!).

On Tuesday I did my first ever Pilates class which was the perfect class to ease me back into group sessions.  They turn the lights down low and go at a slow pace so I felt really comfortable there.  It was a hard class though, I'm still aching in muscles I didnt know I had!  Wednsday had me attempting my first Zumba class, and well... that didnt go down so well.  I was too unco and couldnt follow enough of the class to get much of a workout but I did come home and You Tube the basic Zumba steps - I love latin music and dancing so I am determined to master Zumba eventually!  The next day was Body Attack - much easier to follow and great fun.  My instructor was this HUGE muscley kiwi guy which I was totally not expecting - he was a legend though and made it such a fun class! Can't wait to go back to that one.  Next day was another Pilates class then today I braved my first boot camp! 

I am feeling so damn good it's unbelievable.  I am following my meal plans to the letter and I feel so good on the inside.  I can already feel the changes both mentally and physically.  I really really really want this to be a lifestyle change.

Oh and my results of the fitness test put me in the beginner category - I have a long way to go, but I am working hard.  Exercising every day is still such a foreign concept to me I wish I could bottle the feeling I get after a workout so I have it for those days when my mojo is low.

My motivation at the moment is at an all time high. I almost don't recognise myself!  On friday night I had the capsicum & sweet potato pizza, which I had been looking forward to all week but I found that I just wasnt satisfied with it!  All the other meals have been such delish hearty serves, I felt a bit gipped when it came to the Pizza.  It's made me realise that it wasn't really worth it.  Tonight is "treat" night but we're just having a yummy old vegie roast and apple tart for dessert.  I was too nervous to eat out in my first week for fear of falling off the wagon!

I am planning to step it up next week, and I am really keen for a loss on the scales.  I can feel my body changing already - Tonight I am sitting here wearing a favourite pair of rigid jeans that I couldn't even do up last week... How good is that!?  Love it! 

Have a great week 2 everyone!! x

Fitness Test... Well, that was an eye opener!

Okay, so I finally did my fitness test and the results came in at... *drum roll please*.... BEGINNER! :(

I was pretty bummed with that result but I am trying to take solace in the fact it can only get better from here. I *almost* made intermediate for the time trail (8.31sec). It was a bit of a wake up call about my abominable strength - I couldn't even do one sit up properly but I was in the advanced category for the flexibility/stretch one... weird?

The hardest part is right now I am feeling a bit overwhelmed and a little shocked at how bad my fitness level is. I knew I was unfit, but it goes to show how much I have been kidding myself lately. A part of me really wants to sneak a packet of chips and eat my emotions but I'm trying to ignore that. 

Thank you to those brave brave souls who have put up their transformation videos in You Tube - I watched a couple just now and ended up in tears over the amazing changes.  It's really helped me to keep my focus in the right place, and resist the temptation to binge or eat my emotions. Kudos!

Note to Self #1

When you wake up early without the help of an alarm clock - GET UP!

Don't go back to sleep, or you'll just feel like shit when you get up the second time around and you know what happens then! You won't "feel" like exercising because your head is full of cotton, and you probably won't... then you will feel racked with guilt, then you'll probably binge and hate yourself for it. NOT WORTH IT!

Plus, you've also just wasted a couple of good quiet hours that you could have used doing other more productive things (like finishing your pre-season tasks!). 

Sleep ins are over-rated anyway :)

Mindset Monday Blog Challenge - If you can dream, it you can achieve it!!!

This is a great idea thought up by Kath over at http://courage2start.blogspot.com/

She writes:

If you can dream it, you can achieve it!!!
I want you to paint me a word picture. Pretend today is not today. You are not nervous, or overwhelmed or apprehensive or excited about the next 12 weeks. You are none of those things because you have LIVED it! You are at the finish line!

Before you achieve it - you have to dream it. Put those dreams down. Make them real.

 So this is my response...


A little over 12 weeks later and I standing in the hotel suite, putting on the last few items of jewellry. My hair is done, my make up is perfect and I've slipped into the most gorgeous dress I've ever owned - and, for once, I feel like I'm actually doing the dress justice.

Today is my very best friend's wedding day, and we have slugged it out for 12 long weeks but it has been worth every single moment - the beautiful bride, along with another close friend whom is also a bridesmaid, and myself have gone through this journey together. Along with the 12wbt friends we have made, we have supported each other and inspired each other every step of the way. Together, the three of us have each lost a minimum of 10kgs each and have become fit, strong and infused with confience - and it shows.

My arms are toned, my waist has shrunk, my posture is proud and my skin is glowing with health. I'm so happy that I finally kicked my chip-binge habit whenever stress or boredom stuck, and replaced it with a healthy habit to go for a walk or be active in some way instead. It was hard for the first week, but before I knew it, the cravings, the need to binge was gone. I have gained back control in my life and it feels fantastic. I feel calm inside, I have discovered a backbone of steel that I didn't realise I had. I realised I AM worth it. My dedication to the program has infused my whole life with success. I've stuck to it, every bloody step of the way, against all the odds and despite the doubters. Now I am reaping the rewards. I still have a long way to go, but I am loving the journey. I am getting stronger every day, and building the life I have always dreamed of.

Zero Point

Today is Zero Point day.... Zero Point is what I like to call my 'optimum' setting. A clean house, a decluttered wardrobe, a healthy bank balance, good food in my fridge and an organized workspace... all those things that help you feel calm and in control.  For me, not having to worry about cleaning or clutter or disorganization means that I have more energy to focus on the things that matter - like this journey.  

I've been sick with the flu the past week or so, which means my poor house is in a bit of a shambles.  Darling Mr M got in and helped me in sorting the kitchen a bit last night so at least that is one less thing to worry about today.

Zero Point is my favourite place to be.  When everything has it's place, it's so much easier for me to maintain, and therefore a lot less stress.  It only works if I'm diligent and put in the effort though, so this is just one of the new habits I want to be forming throughout this transformation.

Once I've gotten as close to Zero Point as I can possibly get, then this afternoon I'll be sitting down to review Week 1's meal plan and finish off the rest of my pre-season Tasks including the Goal setting... I love me a good goal setting session!

Tell me what you want, what you really really want...

Okay, this is my first time ever doing this program and frankly, I am pretty scared of what the next 12 weeks will hold. 

You see... I've never really been a fan of exercise. I was always the kid who "forgot" their sports clothes in PE and would spend the class writing out line after line of "I will not forget my PE clothes" over and over and over again.   I never played team sports (unless under duress) and I don't follow any sports other than the Formula 1.  My weekends consist usually of Pizza and a movie on the couch and shock of all horrors, I've been putting on weight.  The more weight I put on and the crappier I feel, the more miserable I get. 

When everyone else gets endorphins after a workout, I seem to just get headaches that border on migraines. When most people go back for more "feel good" sensations, I tend to shy away from more or hard workouts. I usually just feel like shit afterwards and it wrecks my whole day. Having said that, I DON'T want to be scared of exercise. I WANT to be active, I WANT to get outside and grab life. I WANT to run. I WANT to ride. I WANT to feel healthy and strong and I WANT to feel good about myself when I look in the mirror. The hardest part is wanting these things more than a 200g bag of potato chips. I have a real problem with comfort eating... Stress eating, boredom eating... pretty much just eating until I've squashed whatever emotion that was bothering me under something else. Which usually ends up being guilt for being so horrible to my body!

I want to get away from that - I WANT to change. I want to love life, feel good and be confident. I want to feel worthy. I want to dress up and wear nice clothes. I want to stop feeling like my body is the enemy. I want to change the habit of reaching for some Pringles whenever life throws me a curve ball... after all, the problem is still there even if I eat a whole tub! I KNOW a lot of the things I am doing wrong, and what I could do to fix it, but I have been lacking the strength, the motivation to change. I want to shed my bad habits for good and I want to cherish my body. I'm hoping that with the support from this program, I can make some real, lasting changes in my life. I want to make these changes STICK!

You know what they say... "Keep doing what you've always done and you will always get what you've always got".  I'm taking the plunge, grabbing the bull by the horns, giving it all I've got...I know its going to be hard, I know it's probably going to get really freakin' ugly but as terrified as I am, I'm really looking forward to learning to love exercise, to eating well & to cherishing my body along with fellow 12WBT members :)

Woohoo!

First things first...

It's been years since I last blogged and I have to say I am really looking forward to starting again.  Last time it was so theraputic to just get those thought and emotions off my chest and be in contact with other wonderful like-minded people.  I've made some great friends through blogging.

This time around will be interesting... I'm undertaking the Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation challenge.  I'ts my first time... I'm scared!  But faced with the prospect of gaining back ALL the weight (and then some!) of the weight I shed last year (15kgs) in time for my wedding, I am at panic stations.  Do I really want this to be my life? Constantly loosing and gaining weight... but more often gaining!  Do I really want to beat myself up every day because I feel depressed and crappy because I am eating shitty food and not taking care of my body?  Um... NO!

I'm in my 30's now... I don't mind that. My 20's sucked. I am much more confident as a person and I like (usually) who I am on the inside.  I need to stop treating my body as the enemy and start to cherish it.  After all, its the only one I have!!

It's time to be kind to myself... to stop feeling disconnected from my body and to be a bit nicer to it.  All things considered, it's a pretty strong meat suit.  I have given it a lot of abuse over the years and fueled it with alot of junk and little exersise but it's still going strong.  I am so fortunate that I don't suffer from the maladies and illnesses of other overweight folks and I'd really rather not let it get to the point where my LIFE is at risk before I make a change.  I LIKE my life... I have a pretty awesome one... the only thing missing is that loving relationship with my body to make it perfect.

So! Here goes... 12 weeks of putting MY health first.  MYSELF.  No ifs, buts or maybe's.  Time to get outside my comfort zone and change for the better.

BRING IT ON!